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Random me-ism: I do not like catfish

Actually, I don’t care for seafood, lake food, or river food of any kind. I do not care if you grill it, sauté it, fry it, bake it, or put up that big beautiful house with the ocean view as your Facebook cover photo.

Catfish: pretending to be someone they're not using Facebook or other social media to create false identities, particularly to pursue deceptive online romances. (The Urban Dictionary)

I am sure many of you have heard about the show Catfish on MTV. I am not sure if it still comes on; I have only watched two episodes of the show. I just couldn’t bring myself to believe that people would fall for such a thing. Yes, I know that there are people who can create a different identity and become someone they are not. I have seen the Lifetime movies of men living double lives and there was that episode of Criminal Minds. Actually, every episode of Criminal Minds should have you questioning everyone you meet.

I digress.

HOWEVER, on the show Catfish, these people were falling in love with Google images. I just can’t. Maybe it is the ‘single woman not trying to get murdered or put my children in jeopardy’ defense mode, I have when it comes to meeting others.

I am not eating from your table.

Here is a recent encounter I have had with Catfishing:

I get a Facebook message. I open the message it is from a handsome man who happens to like Les Brown. For those who do not know, Les Brown is an awesome motivational speaker whose Facebook page, I visit every morning for his inspiring thoughts.

Well, this man, who from here on out I will refer to as, Mr. Fishtail, tells me that he too is a fan of Les and that . . . get this . . . he just . . . HE JUST . . . met him at the airport. He also wanted me to know that he is one of the nicest people he has ever met.

Now, I know you’re thinking, “Well, Sharon he could have just met Mr. Brown at the airport. Maybe he just went to his page to share his experience and seen that you liked Les’ post that day. Maybe, now he is sitting in the airport terminal writing you because he just could not wait to share personally with another one of Mr. Les Brown’s fans.”

*side eyes you* Okay . . . well, maybe you are correct. But, sorry you are not.

I didn’t reply back. What I did do was go to visit Mr. Fishtail’s profile page. Oh, what a big beautiful house with the ocean view he has. Let me click on his photos. Oh, look at that nice new shiny black car. Let me scroll through the photos to see more and find other pictures of Mr. Fishtail. There is a vacation photo of the beach, and another, and another, and a motorcycle. There is yet another vacation photo and YES there it is . . . a picture of the boat. I mean, you are on all these beaches; you have to have a boat.

Eventually, I get tired of laughing and give up. Sure, he could have posted a picture of himself sometime in 2009 but, I really don’t have time to look through 300+ vacation photos to find it.

So, no, Mr. Fishtail you cannot be my friend and you cannot email me occasionally in order for us to inspire one another. Matter-of-fact, I will not even be replying. But, hey you really don’t need to email me when you have 997 other (all female) friends.